
On August 5th my wife, Michele and I will reach 25 years of marriage. I posted an invitation to the celebration on Aug. 3rd for all our Active Rain friends at Celebrating in Teravista should any of you be able to attend we would love to see you.
I thought it might be interesting to look back at 25 years of marriage and see what I have learned that has been helpful in keeping our marriage fresh and exciting.
Number One: has to be our relationship with God though Christ. Over 25 years our marriage has been tested in a every way possible. The glue is our love of God and commitment to living out the purpose He has for our lives. That purpose brought us together in the first place and we have enjoyed every day of our lives together on Purpose.
Number Two: would have to be the friendship we have. We love being together, working together, seeing new places together and on and on. My best friend ever by far is my wife Michele. We laugh everyday together.
Number Three: We have learned how to compliment each other and not embarrass each other. I can hear her in the other room talking about things I have said as if I were some great author, or philosopher or CEO of a gigantic company. I have never missed one of her birthdays or special occasions. I buy nice appropriate gifts, except the one Christmas when I bought her a gun, she hated it. Fortunately for me it was not the main gift, I was worried for her since at that time, I was traveling a great deal. It is easy to buy the right things, I just listen to what she says all year long and I hear what she likes.
Number four: We are One. We have always had ONE bank account, ONE group of friends, ONE set of homes we own, ONE set of cars we own, ONE set of rules for the children, ONE church we attend, ONE set of goals and plans to reach them. This can be challenging and takes constant work because by nature we are very selfish all of us. Yes, we have individual personalities and expressions of that in our marriage but ultimately we are both willing to compromise so that the two of us can function as ONE.
Number five: We have set up healthy boundaries. Our children can articulate the boundaries set up for their well being. We also have limited the influence that mean and dysfunctional people can have in our lives even if they are family members from her side or mine. I love my family as Chele does hers but our priority is our immediate family. We want to keep them safe and emotionally healthy and in order to do that we needed to set up boundaries.
Alan
email at: roundrockhomes@gmail.com